on the side lines

so lately people think I have been just lazing around but nope I have been busy every day sure  I  make lesser money than before but I still make some I also have been studying more on topics that  might help me in the near future hopefully but that is all okay things have different then before noticed I have changed I don't know if it if for the better or worse during this time I have learned more about myself as well and has reflected the faults in my life I have been working hard for me to change for the better as some old problems have been popping out but some new things have come out good things I still hope for a job sure it will greatly help me and the household I have been feeling guilty as well for not reaching the expectations that my parent have for me and they might see her as a failure because of that and I don't want that for her so even in the little ways I have been doing things to lessen the stress she has and will someday hopefully all this work I have been doing in the side lines will be all for the good of all thank you for reading my rant and have a good day.